Hey yo...
It's me, Dr. Evil and I'm back after 7 years of being held hostage inside Mike Myers.
I think it was quite appropriate that I decided to come out on Halloween, don't you?
Let's have some fun.
MY MISSION HERE IS SIMPLE PEOPLE:
I have FOUR simple missions in you watching this bit of complete improv that took place over countless days (maybe even months) that Dr. Evil had fun taping and hope you have just as much fun watching
The missions are, to...
1. Make you laugh and crack a smile while showing you that Internet Marketing can be fun.
2. Give back and help a couple of people as we approach the holiday season (I really am being GOOD now, not evil)
3. Challenge you in the $20,000 Halloween contest below
4. Express yourself by sharing below what your favorite video was if you rather not engage in the competition. :P
Now, to catch up where we last left off...
If you happened to catch the third movie, you know that I reunited with Austin and he ended up opening up my heart to non-evil things, you know?
I began feeling good feelings, and now, I truly want to do GOOD by people.
Really, I do!
However, there were times during my rehabilitation process (yes, I'm in a 12-step evil recovery program), but I'm going to be honest that there are times that I still want to do things that invoke my old evil ways.
Having looked and looked around for a group of people that deserve to be gone after, I decided to shoot this video to explain:
But I told you, I have this part of me that primarily wants to do good now and I want to share it with others (and you).
I know, it's complex.
Allow me to explain the soft side as we travel out in public together to see how folks react to Dr. Evil coming out on his own (the new mini-me is filming):
Cool, now while I've got my food in hand, I'll explain what I mean about this whole softer side to me (it almost makes me gooshy watching this myself):
Now that we've cleared up the fact that I'm now GOOD and not evil, it's all great.
But Dr. Evil is now unemployed (and most likely unemployable)!
And see, back in 02 when the third movie came out, the online thing yo was not as HOT as it is now, with Twitter.com (follow me there) and all this Facebooking going around.
Dr. Evil is tired of the OFFLINE thing, I want ONLINE game.
I still have motivations even though I'm not evil, you know?
DR. EVIL MAKES A CAREER CHANGE
Okay, so I went to the man who motivates the world over, Mr. Tony Robbins and began listening to his audio tape series.
I can only listen to independent thinkers.
So I realized that needed to get leverage over myself.
I went out and declared what I was going to do for my new career right out in public.
Heck, I went out to Jack in the Box in public, I can do this.
It was interesting. People thought I was just a regular guy, but then when I kept talking like Dr. Evil while at Raleys in Lake Tahoe, here, I'll let you listen in:
Now you know.
Dr. Evil has a secret wife of 10 years.
And he also wants to be an Innnnnnnternet Marketer (me and 20 million other people).
I even had kids on the street giving me their opinions on what I should do for work:
But Dr. Evil is too old to be an "Agent" and I want online game.
So now what?
What do I do?
Launch a website?
Tell me people.
I've got NO product, NO list, NO connections, and people think I'm evil.
Look -- when I asked this man what he thought of my snowboarding outfit, you'll see how they react:
Now you already know from the headline (or sub-headline above) that I now occupy the body of a well known marketer.
I've got complete access to his resources and past experiences. And...
One of the first places I go and join is the Warriors Forum which seems to be a hot internet marketing forum where this marketer started back in 2003.
Preparing for my success, I start practicing a rap tune (since I do a rap for all my movies).
I know for sure that this will further declare my mission that I want online game:
Joining a forum is all good and dandy.
But here's the thing, Dr. Evil has no more evil organization, nobody to help him.
So what to do?
Outsource?
But Dr. Evil doesn't have much money.
I'm on a tight budget with this economy.
And another thing people. I don't have chauffeurs and all the glamour anymore... the trilogy is over.
I realize I've got to do things by myself! I'm even teaching myself how to drive (at night - eeeks!)
DR. EVIL TAKES CONTROL OF INTERNET MARKETER'S BUSINESS AND GIVES AWAY $20,000 IN REAL PRODUCTS AND SERVICES
Having a slight tendency to slip back into my evil nature, I ended up taking over this internet marketer (just for Halloween) and he seems to have some pretty cool services and products I'm just going to be giving away in a contest.
Here's what the contest is all about.
This is NOT going to be easy because the Grand Prize winner walks away with $9,915 in real value services that clients pay for every single day.
The 9 other winners will receive prizes in excess of $1,000 each!
This is NO JOKE people.
Here's all you need to do.
1. You need to guess who Mini-Me is and what HER name is, as there is a slip mention of it in one the videos.
2. Guess and estimate how many days coverage the filming of Dr. Evil took place (HINT: You can check out Dr. Evil's YouTube Page right here.
3. Guess how many TOTAL videos were made during this production (HINT: it's NOT the number of videos in Dr. Evil's YouTube Page right here.
4. In your comment submission below, simply state HOW a Personalized and Customized $5,000 mentoring package would change your life by receiving it from an actual business owner and software developer and not some 9 to 5 coaching drone hired by some guru. Try to include as much passion in your answer as possible
The overall combination closeness to the right answer and your content and passion behind #4 will decide the ultimate Grand Prize Winner.
To get involved do the following...
(1) Post your submission in the comment section below by clicking here
Include within your contest submission:
(a) your guess of who mini-me is and her name
(b) your guess of how many days video production of Dr. Evil took (use resource above)
(c) your guess of how many videos total were taken (use resource above)
(d) HOW winning the Grand Prize would change your life and WHY you should win
(e) your real name and email address (we can't give prizes away to NO NAMES)
(2) Contest submissions will be taken up until midnight on Halloween, October 31, 2009.
(3) There 10 winners will be announced here on this thread, so book mark it and pay attention coming November 5-7.
(4) Make your one contest submission count so watch the videos.
Grand Prize winner will receive a $9,915 package of REAL services (some lasting for 3 years with others that last a lifetime) and these are real products and services that people pay for every day, not to mention the GP winner exclusively gets a $5,000 Personal Mentoring Package with the ACTUAL business owner.
This is not some "coaching" program where some drone that was hired by some guru at the rate of $10 an hour sits in a cubicle and you end up paying $6,000 for the guru to get richer.
Now go and do your research people (muhahahahaha - muhahahaha).
The power of Christ compels you...
Signed in my own evil writing if I could,
Dr. Evil, Founder
The New Evil Is Good
P.S. Don't quit being an internet marketer and never give up on your dream because you could become a box stacker at Walmart
P.P.S. It's devastating when you have setbacks and Dr. Evil's own DVD went out during the recording of this video story
P.P.P.S. For Dr. Evil going out into the regular world is very troubling and why I've recorded my very first checkout at Walmart
P.P.P.P.S. Wouldn't you know it, the first time I go out to a major retailer and this happens...
P.P.P.P.P.S Here are some more videos for you to check out...
I told people about my neat little doggie and they kept asking where the wolf dog was, some wouldn't believe me! But that's okay, you know...
I keep telling you that Dr. Evil is a man of proof and I'm going to show you Warriors all the proof and here's the dog (which btw the lineage comes directly from White Fang's blood line http://i28.tinypic.com/i77ktj.jpg, a domesticated breed of over 18 years)
So then I meet a supposed quote unquote psychic who supposedly can guess what Dr. Evil's REAL NAME is...
I got seriously bored with the psychic homeless dude and decided to get some customer service from the gal in the snowboarding shop who sold me my outfit earlier so she could help me find a belt. When customer service is done right, it warms my heart...
You know, to show you that I've grown even during the filming of this whole series.
After returning from Tahoe, I went out and bought a high definition camera because people wanted to see up close shots of my bald head and whether a serious, successful internet marketer would really shave his entire head of hair to transform into the new Dr. Evil. (Was that an actual call out to any marketer who would have juevos to do such a thing and even show his face on camera? Because the only one I know that might even be close to doing it would be the Moffatt man (and no, I did not mean the Muffin Man for you Shrek fans). :P
Now, I'll admit, I am a newbie at this, but I'm doing all that I can to do whatever I can to be independent, remember folks?
So I went to Amazon.com and bought myself an HD camera with some lighting and I'll admit I'm no expert, but a total neophyte.
No one from my evil organization would even help me, it was like a red flag to call out the violinists with lasers beams on the violin's bow. Shed no tears for me people, I'm strong!
But Dr. Evil needed to move up to the next level of video with this video marketing being all the rave and these geysers shooting off all over the place.
And after some have watched a video or two, most ask what I use to keep my head so smooth and slick when I get the 5 o'clock shadow... :P Do you remember what I told them I use? That's right Gillette...
And I'm doing exactly what my life coach Tony Robbins tells me on my tapes. Not only do I keep my energy high, but I work my body, see...
However, sometimes, Tony Horton I think he's a bit too intense, you know?
So I turned to that Turbo Jam gal...
Oh yeah much more my speed. ;)
Click here to submit your entry
